You Know You're A Dog Person When..........

Humour » You Know You're A Dog Person When..........

 You spend $20 in entry fees, $50 in gas, $150 in lodging and meals, all for a .50 ribbon.

Your family room has crates in it.

You have extra cleaning bills for the squished up liver ground into the pockets of your jacket, pants, shirt........

When buying a new house, the first thing you check is whether the yard is good enough!

When you're shopping for a new dress, and decide against one that is beautiful and really flatters you because it doesn't have pockets for bait.

When your main consideration in buying a new pair of shoes is whether they have non-skid soles so you won't fall while gaiting your dog.

When almost every color of dress in your closet is the same, because that is the color that best compliments your dog - even if it's a terrible color for you.

When your family reunion and dog show falls on the same weekend, and you send your apologies to the family.

Every conversation you have eventually mentions dogs, even if you're talking about flowers, libraries, reading, what not.

When you're short on money and are more worried about whether the dogs have enough food for the month, than about your own groceries.

When you can't remember someone's name, but you say, "Oh, you know, Fido's owner."

When the first thing you do say is, "Hi Fido!" and only then say hello to Fido's owner. But you forget their name.

When you rip out all the carpets and replace them with tile to avoid fleas and be easier to clean, and then bring in carpet scraps to make beds so the dogs don't have to sit on the cold floor.

In meetings and other conversations, you use similes and metaphors that relate to dog training, like "He's bristling around like an alpha, and we're going to have to roll him over and grab his throat to get his attention." (that one usually shakes up the management pretty good) Or when you start telling your children, "Sit! Stay!"

When you pick up smelly dog poop with just a baggie and not think twice about it. AND then carry it nonchalantly all over God's creation until you can find a trash can to dump it in. Or stick it in a pocket until then.

Someone says, "She's a rotten Bitch" and you look to see what dog they're talking about

Or when your daughter tells you, in frustration, "there are other things in the world besides dogs", and you can't figure out what.

When a wedding is being planned for your son, and he asks first if that weekend has any majors, or could they schedule the wedding then...

You stop wearing your clothes because the dogs chewed out your pockets from the outside.

You go to the local park and look at the dogs running around the park and see all the faults.

Vacations are planned around Specialties.

Or when your only non-dog friend comes over and asks, "What is that smell?" and you have no idea what she is talking about.

If your dog doesn't like someone, instead of apologizing, you ask them to leave.

You refer to kid's personalities as temperament.

Your pajamas have a bait pocket.

You go to a Walt Disney movie and watch Pluto's gait.

You see an attractive person walking a dog and you study the dog first.

When you meet an old friend at ringside - and first greet their dog!

When you know people by what dog they own.

You never talk to your neighbors, but you know the names and breed of every dog for blocks.

You immediately notice if a new dog moves in.

Discussing worming a dog in a spaghetti restaurant seems normal.

When someone calles you a Bitch and you take it as a compliment.

- Author Unknown